Sunday, June 22, 2008

Another Huffing Victim

I just read about another younger person that is in the hospital from huffing -- She is 13 years old and unconscious. WHEN is this going to stop -- WHAT can I do to make it stop -- it is just so frustrating to hear about these senseless deaths -- I am tired of the pain in my heart from not having Kaitlyn here.

I have a renewed fire in my soul to DO SOMETHING -- I am just not sure what yet -- do I reach out to the manufacturers of this crap and try to work with them to get more awareness out to the kids -- I am thinking this may be the way to go with it -- maybe if they get behind a PSA campaign it will reach more people then what I am doing and I will not have to read about another family dealing with this.

URGHHH I am just so frustrated right now --

Saturday, June 14, 2008


For the longest time I have been having a hard time remembering the little things about Kaitlyn and it really was getting to me -- I mean it hasn't even been two years and it seemed like I couldn't remember her anymore.

For the past couple of days I have been having random memories coming back to me -- like the way she used to say squirral and yellow, how she LOVED to go fishing, what a talented artist she was. I have bought a small notebook that I keep with me at all times so that when I do get a random memory I can right it down.

This sudden burst of memories got me to thinking -- is my brain ready for me to deal with the fact that this is all I have left of Kaitlyn -- memories. Am I ready to deal with the reality that is now my life -- I am not sure if I am but I am glad to get the memories.

On the memories thread -- I went to CKU last weekend -- I was very excited to go because I was taking the album track with Margie. I just love her style. It was awesome to get to meet her in person -- she is so funny and just so down to earth. It was a great day. I also took a mini class with Tim Holtz. Anyone that knows me knows that I am anal about things being perfect -- WELL I had to let that go in his class and let me tell you it was WONDERFUL. It is OK not to be perfect --

This lesson goes so much deeper than scrapbooking for me -- once I got it I was in tears -- It is OK that I was not the perfect mom to my kids and more importantly is OK that they are not "perfect" in the eyes of the world -- BUT to me there are not two more PERFECT children in the world.

OH one more thing -- I developed a serious crush on Tim -- he is just the sweetest and cutest man in the world -- AND he has all this cool stuff that I am just loving to use now -- I am trying to figure out a way to get him here for the next Kaitlyn's Crop :)