Wednesday, March 21, 2007

Missing Kaitlyn

Kaitlyn had a love of life that was contagious -- she had fun where ever she went (sometimes a little too much fun) -- I miss her goofiness so much -- I would do anything to deal with her craziness -- her loudness -- HER just one more time -- will this pain EVER go away.



Jeremy misses her so much too and is hurting but does not know how to express his feelings -- so many times it comes out in other ways -- Impatient when things are not going his way, moodiness more than normal, easy to anger, and just plain sadness. Everyone has gone on with their lives -- expecting Jon, Jeremy and me to do the same -- it is not happening -- everyday we are reminded that our lives are NEVER going to be the same. What so many people take for granted we don't anymore. We are scared to get close to people because we know how much it hurts when it is gone. We treasure important people in our lives and don't let "little stuff" get in the way because we know that whatever happens NOTHING is as bad as what we have gone through already. At the same time we have an "I don't care" attitude that many people just don't get -- our whole way of living has forever changed us -- little things don't bother us anymore -- we don't sweat the small stuff -- I just wish there was a way to make people understand -- we are not the same people we were August 26, 2006 -- those people are gone -- the ones that took their place are fragile -- we are still trying to become whole again -- We don't expect people to walk on eggshells BUT we do hope that they would try to understand that a HUGE part of our heart is forever gone -- we are incomplete -- not sure when we will be whole again --

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

I just have to say that I am praying for you still. God can heal your broken heart but it will take time. Please seek his comfort and love. I can't understand the pain you are going through, but I can imagine that it would be awful. But you can get through this and keep on living. That is what Kaitlyn wants you to do. Love ya! ~Korin

dannigirl said...

girl, i just wanna wrap my arms around you and give you a big hug. i wish that i could take some of your pain away.i know that i can not.you have been in my prayers. if you ever need to talk, no matter what time, call me. i am here for you. may god look upon you, jon and jeremy. love ya.
~d

trace-e said...

Wow, I'm not sure how I came across your blog, I think through 2peas but man I have spent the last 1/2 hour crying and praying. I'm soooo very sorry for what you had to go through. I'm a young mom still in my early 30's but I have two teenage girls that are almost 16 and 14 years of age and an 8 year old boy and I fear something like this could happen to our family. I'm so very sorry. I don't know what else to say.